Panicking, kisses, home...

I´m ashamed to admit that I panicked a little. I am not and never have been a panicker (except when my mother makes me stay in 1 store for more than four hours). I have excuses that I can throw out, such as I hadn´t slept for more than 3 hours in 3 days and I was in a new country with all signs in different language in a huge ass airport, but the truth that I panicked a little is still there. It cannot be covered. The entire flight from London to Madrid, which consisted of about 20 people and 4 flight attendants (2 of whom were the cheeriest Brits/people I have ever met in my life) I dreaded the wheels setting down because then it was go time. I was terrified, truly and beautifully as uncomfortable as I have ever been in my 21 years. I followed a British couple off the plane and just decided to stick with them because they probably knew what they were about.

The Madrid airport is amazing. I flew into Terminal 4, which just opened this year. Everything about the building, from the huge arched, Cathedral style ceiling to the floor to ceiling glass about five floors high suggested to me that the Spaniards are an opulent people, which I have discovered so far to be both true and not true.

I went through the "Otros Países" (otros being others beside citizens of the EU) to get my passport/visa stamped. Without thinking I walked to the guy in the booth and said hello as he said hola. This is not where I panicked, although I did kinda feel like an ass. When he stamped it and gave it back, after inspecting it closely which made me nervous for God knows why, I said gracías to make up for it as he said thank you. This was interesting to me though admittedly not significant.

I almost panicked when I got to the bottom floor to catch the underground airport tranportation system to the baggage claim. Everything is in Spanish and I could barely remember how to say hello! I was multiple stories below ground with about a hundred Spaniards/foreigners and the intercom was saying something and I didn´t know what and I got a little nervous. This was like loosen the collar nervous.

Through some miracle I made it without directions into the tram and back out when it stopped. This seemed like a major accomplishment to me at the time. I took the elevators back up to find myself faced with roughly 12 baggage claim belts. This, however daunting, was not the time I panicked. The panicking came when I got my bags and then had nowhere to go.

I had been considering this at some length during the end of my flight and now it was before me. Since I was late arriving for the program and the orientation had begun the day before, I didn´t know if the group would still be at the hotel or what. Maybe panicking is a strong term for it, but I definitely could have lost it. Considering the circumstances (not having anywhere to go, the ATMs not accepting my debit card so I had no money, not being able to get change because all the shops around were closed, trying to call the directors and not being able to figure out how the phones or phone numbers worked, etc.) I really don´t feel terrible about freaking out a little.

Anyhow, I finally got some change (thanks to the personal wallet of a cute 20ish girl working at the information booth who took pity on me) and got a hold of the USAC folks. They are fantastic and this one experience was enough to show me that. Susan got on the phone with me and talked me through getting a cab and getting straight to my apartment. I was so thankful to talk to someone so calm and clear. She gave me address, directions, advice and the spot for meeting the group the next morning. I was so grateful for her that night. I took a deep breath and pushed my trolley out into the open air and climbed into a cab.

I consider this airport experience to be my very brief culture shock. I know technically it´s supposed to last longer than that but I really think that was it for me. I panicked and then I stopped. It was as simple as that. I was also very personally impressed with my Spanish. I had to talk to all sorts of people and I did... and well. I was suprised at how easy it was for me to approach a stranger sitting behind a desk labeled "Información" and ask for information in a language I don´t speak fluently. This may not make any sense, but I was proud of myself for successfully getting out of the airport and into the city. I was finally here and doing the whole Spanish thing that I´ve waited for so long to do. All in all, it felt great when I took my first full breath in a week when I sat back in the cab.

I arrived at my building(Nº 28, El Paseo Reína Cristína) and the cabbie pulled away with all my bags sitting on the sidewalk. There was a kid, he is probably about 18, smoking next to the door and watching me. I went to the buzzer and called the apartment on the 7th floor a la izquierda (to the left). Carmen answered how she always does, "Vale, vale." The kid helped me bring in my bags and was the first to ask me the question I can´t seem to escape... "You´re American, yeah?" I told him I was and he was stoked. This is not always the reaction, although more than expected. The next question he asked I have heard even more than the first... "You have a boyfriend?" I told him I didn´t and he was stoked. This is when I had another first (classic) Spanish experience. He introduced himself (Pedro) and leaned in and kissed both my cheeks. I love this, by the way, and I don´t know how I ever introduced myself to people without doing it.

We loaded my bags into the world´s smallest elevator and I went to the seventh floor where Carmen was waiting with the door open for me. I got another 2 kisses and a big hug. This was exactly what I needed even though I didn´t know it. She helped me bring in my bags to my temporary office room (my floors were being redone) and made me some hot tea. I am so lucky to have such a great host mom. A lot of the others have quirky Spanish host families, but Carmen is super laid back and comforting. She lets me come and go as I please and makes me food when I´m home and chills when I´m not. She is fantastic and I love her. She has had over 30 American students stay with her over the past 11 years so she really understands our ways even if not our language. She doesn´t speak a word of English besides hello and good-bye and the like. This works out brilliantly for me because we can speak only Spanish to each other. When I´m around her, I just point to things around the house or on the TV and ask ¿Cómo se dice este en español? This system works well and I can´t wait to learn all I can from her in the months to come.

I was so beat from travelling that I fell into my bed and never wanted to get up again.